Actual Patient Interaction:
“I don’t know if you’ve talked to the trauma surgeons yet, Miss Green, but they tell me everything’s fine, no internal organs were injured, and they’ll probably discharge you tomorrow after they observe you for a while. You were very lucky.”
“Where’s my boyfriend?”
“He’s talking to the police.”
“Do you think he’ll go to jail?”
“Probably.”
“Do you think he’s still mad at me?”
“I have no idea. Listen, Miss Green, I have two daughters. In fact, you’re young enough to be one of them so I hope you don’t take this as anything other than a sincere concern for you but have you ever considered that you’d be better off without this guy? I mean, you’re young, bright, and obviously very intelligent. You’ve got your whole life ahead of you, completely wide open, and I’d hate to see you end up saddled with a couple of this guy’s kids, without any support, living in some dump, and struggling through life when you could be a real success.”
“But he loves me.”
“I don’t think so.”
“How can you say that?”
“Well, he did shoot you in the vagina….”